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| Melissa Williams December 2008 |
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| Description: |
| My God!!! The month is starting out crazy!!! |
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 I spent over an hour yesterday writing a huge update and then it just disappeared!! I got so frustrated that I just closed the computer for the rest of the day.
So much has happened and I have not had the energy to write. Will try to update you and take you through it quickly.
The first week in december, I fought with kidney stones and was back in the emergency room. I have eaten antibiotics like they were candy (just to hear from the doctor yesterday and hear that I have taken the wrong sort and must take a new cure...arrggghhh). But all in all, I feel fine. Surprisingly.
I'd really like to skip the boring details and go right into Dansbands kampen.
We arrived there in the middle of the night after gigging the night before at mälarsalen. It was a fantastic gig, but there was very little sleep that might, maybe 3 hours. Soundcheck was at 7 am. The voice was in good shape despite the lack of sleep and afterwards I grabbed my things and went to Lillen's room. He went himself down to soundcheck and I took my shower and started getting ready for some web tv interviews. After a while, he came back. We kissed and had some small talk and he watched me while I put my makeup on. He looked at me with so much love, but then suddenly he asked, What does Robban look like?
I was stunned by the question and asked him to reapeat the question. He asked again and I was perplexed that he wondered or cared. I said that I had thought I had a pic in my telephone and I showed him. Then he dropped the bomb. He has just introduced himself to me.
Oh.My.God. He was there!!! Lillen wonders if I knew. I say no. I am shocked and wondered why this had to be the case now?
I do my interviews and then look for Robban. I have no idea what he knows about me or Lillen or anything. I find him. His back is to me and I touch his back. He turns around and gives me a very warm smile and hugs me hard. When it's time to relaese the hug, he holds me harder. It's familiar and nice. I whisper in his ear that I am happy to see him and he whispers the same, adding that he loves me. I say I love him. I say my hello's to the band. I recognise the bass player. Robban's favorite bass player, Niklas Arn.
I move on with my day and we bump in to each other here and there through the day. At one point, I am outside talking to Robban and Lillen comes out. We are to go back to his room. When Lillen's back is turned, Robban shoots him a look that could kill and then I am pretty sure that Robban knows about us. I follow Lillen back to the room and we enjoy our one hour together in the middle of the day, in the middle of the chaos.
Then rest is a blur of makeup and hair and costumes and the contest. You should have felt the feeling when I walked out on stage. There were 3000 people screaming and I felt the love. I had so much adrenaline! I felt like a tiger pacing in her cage. I was focused and ready and hungry. Almost too much so. When I watch the tape, I see clearly why I scared Thomas, though I believe I would scare him even on my weakest niveau. He seems like a scaredy cat. Magnus and Anna got me, however, am I am grateful for that.
As you know, we didn't win, but the experience was one of the coolest I have ever had. It was overshadowed by Robban, who was very upset at the end of the show. Very upset and this upset me, which upset Lillen, but at the end of the night we were where we wanted to be. We were together in bed, holding one another and I can only imagine the strange feelings Lillen must have had that night, but he loved me and supported me even when he didn't understand me. That means the world to me.
The next day he followed me up to my gig and we had our magical sunday on monday instead. When the kids got home, we took them bowling and had dinner and we had a marvelous time together. The next day I took him to his press conference and now he is gone back to Lidköping. The kids and I are ok, but I am missing him right now. I want him here with me.
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